Day 185 part 2


[Everyday Headspace] Knowing ourselves 10mins
"Sometimes, in not knowing ourselves fully, we rely on the opinions of others, who may not even know themselves."
The 10 minutes session this afternoon saved the day! With noise-canceling, I was able to really concentrate on breathing. Although there were some times my mind wondered off or dozed off, I noted those instances and brought attention back to my breath. I also confirmed again about my theory on the location of breath. My attention can change the location where the air comes into my nose. 
The reason/drive for me to meditate is to know more about myself. I am not good at ‘knowing someone’, including myself. That’s just a fact. I haven’t been paying much attention to people before. I didn’t look for the personality, preference, background, etc of people. I expect and accept people are different in all aspects, but I was lazy that I didn’t look into those differences. I wanted to change that because of my wife. Not only because she indirectly challenged me to be more aware of others, but I also want to do it for her. Although I did want to be a better boyfriend to my ex before, I really didn’t commit to it. My wife is important to me enough or my love for her is enough to drive me into resolution. Or maybe marriage is playing a role here as well. I am no longer want to be a good mere boyfriend, I am aspired to be a good husband. We talked about how funny that before being married, we didn’t think there would be anything different between us. It turns out it’s a world apart. It’s not anything in the physical realm, but everything in the mental and relationship realm. EVERYTHING

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