"How to win friends and influence people" notes

by Dale Carnegie

People wants to feel important. very fundamental desire of people.

How to hand people
  • don't criticize, condemn or complain 
  • give honest and sincere appreciation
  • arouse in the other person the eager want
Ways for people to like you
  • become genuinely interested in people
  • smile
  • remember people's names. it very important to them
  • be a good listener and encourage them to talk about themselves
  • talk in terms of other people's interest
  • make the other people feel important and do it sincerely 
Win people to your way of thinking

  • best to avoid argument
  • value other people’s opinion, never say “you’re wrong”
  • when being wrong, admit it quickly and wholeheartedly 
  • begin a friendly way
  • get the other person say “yes yes” immediately
  • let the other person do a great deal of talking
  • let the other person feel the idea is theirs 
  • try see things from the other person’s point of view, honestly
  • be empathetic to the other person’s idea
  • appeal to nobler motive. e.g. want to excel, live up to expectation
  • dramatize your idea. catch their attention
  • throw down a challenge
Be a leader
  • begin with praise and honest appreciation 
  • call attention to people's mistakes indirectly
  • talk about own mistake before criticizing others
  • ask questions instead of giving direct order
  • let the other person save face
  • praise improvements (even small)
  • give other person fine reputation to live up to
  • use encouragement, make the fault looks easy to correct 
  • make the other person happy doing the things you suggest (think what he want and how he can get it)

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